Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Top Five One Night Stand Mistakes

The Top Five One Night Stand Mistakes
propagated by Don Juan wannabees:

Know When to Fold 'Em
Sometimes it's just not going to happen. Don't find that out at last-call, but don't force the issue either, Sparky.

Breaking Point

Have your social lubricant, but moderation is key. It's hard to seal-the-deal when Whisky Richard makes an appearance.

Managing Expectations
Experienced philanderers are well-versed in this supremely subtle art. Managing a potential partner's outlook is key and can mean the difference between a successful romp (or three) and lot of awkward misunderstandings and explanations.

The Long Goodbye
Nothing is more awkward than over-staying your welcome, so get a clue Romeo. If she's already snoring, it's up to you whether or not to stay over. But be prepared to make haste upon waking the next morning. Meeting the roommates, having brunch and *gasp* cuddling are the stuff of relationships, not wanton sex.

We'll put it this way: if she's not initiating some "morning after" action, she doesn't want you there.

The Walk of Shame
Don't believe the hype! This goes one of two ways: either you're geeked-out from your mega score or shaking your head in disbelief.

If you're geeked as hell then your only embarrassment is the perma-grin under that bed-head. Strut straight on home with head held high; that bedpost needs notching.

But if your beer goggles got the best of you last evening, consider the road less traveled.
Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.
...while the other half is to learn from the best.

For that, we refer you to Cracked's round-up of:

...and you thought Three Dog Night sucked. Pssht!