Thursday, July 24, 2008

Quickie: Yelling at your children in public

Nothing interrupts our search for the perfect papaya* like a parent verbally berating a child in the produce section.


Parents: take your guidelines on this one from the guidelines about arguing in public.


DO:
Discipline your chitlins. We don't need any other public nuisances running around destroying property, peeing on things and making general mischief.

Just remember: they became little rat bastards because...well...you're an asshole.

DO NOT:
Attempt to teach your Devil Spawn a lesson in a public place. We don't want to have to stop another public lashing of a child (no...seriously).

We have enough on our record already and don't need to add Justifiable Homicide to the list just because you decided to slap your Ginger Kid around in the unmentionables section of the department store.

*Psych! ...shopping at grocery stores necessitates that we cook. We don't.



2 comments:

Jenna McCarthy said...

A post script on behalf of those of us who have kids but are paying GOOD EFFING MONEY TO HAVE SOMEONE ELSE WATCHING THEM SO WE CAN SHOP IN PEACE: Pretty, pretty please... if your kid is throwing a tantrum, take him the F outside.

Anonymous said...

THANK YOU! Can't believe people do actually this - makes me wanna grab and shake them (the parents). Way to call them out - this is so not cool.